Laundry

For those of you that know me well, you know that I HATE laundry. Having many kids causes my laundry to pile up unceasingly. If I do not do laundry every day, it becomes the Mt. Everest of clothes and I end up feeling helpless and powerless and will undoubtedly spend the whole weekend washing and folding until the cows come home (whatever that means). But today the laundry slightly redeemed itself. I was taking my 6yo son's laundry out of the dryer and lo and behold there was a name tag sticker on his shirt that somehow made it through the wash cycle AND dry cycle. Of course it was crusted on the shirt, stuck there for eternity. My first thought was to throw it away. Yes, I know, the easy way out. But something within my heart spoke to me. I had been asking God to show me how to love my kids...especially one of my adopted kids who hurts me constantly with words and actions. I have been so mad at myself because what is needed for this child is far beyond a mother's love. It is the love of Christ that is essential for this child to heal. But what do I do when I'm being yelled at? I want to run. I want to get angry. And I want to protect my heart. I know these feelings are normal and need to be felt. But I have a hard time getting over the hurt and rejection. I know I have the love of Christ in me and He can love this child through me. But there is an obstruction keeping the overwhelming flood of love from gushing all over this child. It is more like a trickle. So what does this have to do with laundry? As I looked at my son's shirt, I thought to myself. I can take the time to pick off these tiny pieces of paper and glue. This shirt is worth it and my son loves wearing it. So as I was picking off the gunk, it was if God were speaking to my heart. He said, you are worth it to me. I am willing to pick away at the tiniest pieces of gunk so that you will be free to love. But it will take time. It will take patience on your part. Just like it is taking patience to pick off this sticker (God knows me so well) on Caleb's shirt. So allow me to pick away at these stickers that are keeping you from experiencing the tsunami of my love. You will receive it. You will be free to receive my love. How do I know this was from God? First of all, I felt this peace come over me (which NEVER happens doing laundry). Second, I felt reassurance that I'm not this loser mom who cannot love a tough child. I am in the "picking phase" in God's gentle, but firm hands. I am being washed by the master dry cleaner. All the stains and tears are being healed and repaired. I am so glad that God jut doesn't throw us away when we have gunk stuck all over us. He loves us and we are worth saving to Him. Who knew laundry could be so healing.