An Inconvenient God in a Convenient World

I was driving with my kids to take dinner to a friend and we saw a dog up ahead.  It was standing in the middle of the road.  We slowly passed it and its head followed us with a look of terror on its sweet face. It was a big golden dog with a collar.  It seemed to be beckoning us crying, “Help!”, in doggy language.  Let me first tell you that I am NOT a dog person.  I like dogs.  I even have one.  Her name is Mia and she is sweet and small and follows me around the house all day.  I like her.  I would even cry if she died, but I’m not in love with her.  If I’m honest, there are days she is just one more creature that needs my time and care.  OK, now that’s settled, let’s get back to the road.  So, unfortunately, I had all my kids in the car with me.  They love dogs.  They saw the dog and saw the look of terror on its sweet face.  They all yelled in unison…”GO BACK! Get the dog!”  Now I had a choice.  I was already late in getting this dinner to my friend.  I had a to do list with me filled from top to bottom.  What do I do?  I really did not want to stop, but I had been asking God to speak to me when He wanted me to do something.  In my heart, I knew I needed to turn around.  So back I went with cheering kids in tow.  We got out of the car and checked the collar.  Good, it has a phone number.  I didn’t even see that her name was Abby.  Ok, I will just call the owner.  We will be heroes and off to do my list we will go.  So I called and there was no answer.  Now I had another choice.  Leave the dog and continue on planned path or detour and be inconvenienced.  I really wanted to leave her (I’m sorry to all you dog lovers), but we decided to go to some houses and see if we could find the owner.  No one was home.  I felt like we were supposed to take the dog with us to drop off the meal.  I’m sure the owner would call soon.  Because of the long list of to-do’s, after I dropped off the meal, I went by my house to tie her up with some water.  She was a very docile, sweet, loving dog.  I put a leash on her as I took her out of the car.  I was holding the handle of the leash in one hand and the rope part of the leash in the other.  Once she saw my dog in the yard, she became Kujo!  She leaped out at my dog as if she was going to devour her in one bite.  As she raced to eat my dog, the rope in my hand sliced a gash in my finger.  It felt like a burn and a cut all at once.  Luckily I had her on the leash so my Mia was safe.  I bandaged my cut, tied the dog up, gave her some water and left to run my errands.

I came back late afternoon and still no call from the owner.  I called her again with the message machine answering.  I left another message.  It was dinner time and again I called with no one home.  I started getting a little panicky.  Then the sun went down and it grew dark.  Abby began to howl and scratch at my door.  I went out to pet her and play with her, but as soon as I went back inside, she howled some more.  I put her in the garage around 7pm so she wouldn’t bother our neighbors.  She just kept howling!  Why did I pick this stupid dog up?  I felt like I had to have a plan for her to spend the night.  I saw myself not getting any sleep as I went to the garage every hour to keep her quiet.  I envisioned our garage mutilated by this terrified dog.  I predicted the next day I would be cranky and irritable due to lack of sleep.  So I did what we all do when we are desperate….I prayed.  I asked God to please have the owner call me before we went to bed.

Around 8:30pm, I got the call.  It turned out that the owner was in Georgia and the people who were house sitting were frantically searching for the dog.  The house sitters saw that there were messages, but couldn’t retrieve them.  Finally, they got a hold of the owner and she called me.  She said that Abby was scared because of a gunshot and that she was a very nervous dog.  She was so appreciative that we took her dog home. And as it turned out, she lives right around the corner from us.  We found her three miles away from our house.

I was inconvenienced.  I know this was a very small price to pay to help this dog and neighbor.  But I could have been spending my time doing what I wanted to do.  How many times do I wake up and have my “quiet time’ with God.  Worshipping, praying and telling Him how much I love Him and then going on my merry way to do “my day.”  My time is valuable.  Why would I take the time to pick up a dog when I had more important things to do?  It is because I think my time is mine.  That what God wants is secondary to my to-do list.  That I will choose how and when to follow God.  If I do my ministry on Wednesday nights, I feel good that I did what God would have me do.  But what about the homeless person on the corner Thursday morning?  What about the woman in front of you in line at the grocery store on Saturday?  What about that dog in the road?  That is too inconvenient.  I don’t have the time. I’m late. I don’t want to see.

Isn’t it the truth that ALL time belongs to God?  That every minute is His to give?  Then why do I think that I can serve God when it’s convenient?  Is it because my life is convenient?  I can get a coffee at the drive- thru and order my groceries on line and buy the latest book on Amazon.  Convenient.  I will schedule you in for dinner when it’s convenient.  I will bake cookies with you when it’s convenient.  I have found that God is not interested in our convenient lives.  He is more interested in the Kingdom Life.  He wants to be able to minister to that drug attic.  He wants to heal that blind man.  He is desperate to talk to that single mom over there.  And who will He use?

You.

Me.

The church. 

How can He use us when we are blinded by the convenient life?  When we are deaf to the voice of God?  When we want it our way?  God is not looking for more ministry.  He is looking for your time.  All 24/7 of it.  To be able to say go, and we will go.  To love that person in front of you at His command. 

To slow.

To stop.

To see!

I want to live this way.  But to be honest, I’m scared.  It is so much safer to read my Bible each morning and serve in my ministry than to give God my every minute of the day.  What if He asks me to go to Africa? What if he tells me to be late for a meeting so that I can help an old woman put groceries in her car?  What if He wants me to hear my child’s heart and I have dinner to make?  I hate to admit it, but dinner CAN’T wait.  The truth is…the child can’t wait.  When will the moment come when I can see?  Which moment will I choose to hear? When will I believe each moment is God’s and I live because He has gifted that moment to me? Jesus was inconvenienced constantly.  He was always on a journey somewhere when someone would need healing or a woman would touch him and power would leave Him. Or he would need to detour to raise the dead (and I thought a dog in the road was bad). He was always open to God because Jesus was doing the Father's business.  He only did what the Father told him to do. I’m wondering if the full life, the adventurous life is really listening to the voice of God and then doing it.  If I love and trust God, then I can believe that he will not give me more than I can handle.  That He will slowly teach me to hear Him and as I obey, He will trust me with more.  The fact is that God did answer my prayer that the owner would call and He did not give me more than I could handle.  When I was inconvenienced, my mind went directly to how this was going to impact me not how God wanted to use this.  Following God is a risk.  I could fail.  But I’ve gotta try. I want to love God better.  I want the full life!  I have nothing to lose and a Kingdom to gain.  Are you with me?  If you are lucky like me, God might just start you off with a dog in the road!

My Story Part 9

When we were asked to take in a 16yo foster daughter and her 2yo son, we were skeptical.   My son was 3yo and my daughter a baby.  What did I know about teenage moms?  We decided to have her over to check her out.  We instantly liked her and her son.  But could we handle it?  We took her on a tour of our home and ended up in the back yard.  My husband had a vegetable garden in the yard and had carefully placed the envelopes of each vegetable on a stick and stuck them in the ground ( I know…stay with me).  These envelopes were tattered and torn from the rain and wind.  I looked at one while giving our tour and the envelope looked like Elvis (I told you…stay with me!!).  A minute later, this young woman, Sarah, said, “Hey, that looks like Elvis.” And she was pointing to the garden envelope.  I knew right then and there that God was calling us to take these kids into our home.  I know it sounds crazy! In fact, I’m laughing out loud right now as I write.  But we were young in our faith and needed a sign.  Who knew God could use Elvis to confirm a prayer?

Sarah was a beautiful, scared, lost 16yo with a 2 yo son.  But we instantly bonded with her.  We had some great times together going to hockey games, out to dinner, movies etc.  It was tricky having her 2yo living with us because I took care of him during the day and she would take over after she got home from school.  When she was mad at me, she would tell her son to not talk to me.  But when she was happy with me, we all got a long great.  When she was about 17yo, she started freaking out.  I think she was scared.  She began to act out against me.  She would smear my food all over my kitchen and would take my car and we couldn’t control her.  The foster agency was a huge help and kept asking us if we wanted her removed.  But I knew God called us to keep them.  God would have to make it clear if she should go.  This trauma went on for months.  And I wasn’t innocent in this either.  I would yell at her and I remember throwing my keys at her.  I was angry and scared and wanted to help her, but couldn’t.  I lost weight  and would spend time at night in my room.  I like to say that Sarah helped me to like beer.  After I put my kids to bed at night, I would get some chips, salsa and beer and lock myself in my room.  I was miserable, but not going to give up.  She began having boyfriends and lying all the time.  We forgave her.  We made contracts.  We set boundaries.  None of it worked and we realized that she had to leave. 

It was devastating.  She was furious that we were “kicking her out with a baby.”  And I felt horrible. I felt like we failed.  I didn’t think we would ever see them again.  But she would keep in touch every now and then.  She ended up in transitional housing and then moved in with her dad.  She began making good choices and got a great job.  We saw her now and then.  She still struggled because she wanted a mom.  She wanted me to be a mom to her.  How could I fill a hole that big?  How could I help her unravel the pain, trauma and abuse she suffered?  There was no end to the depths of her pain.  So I loved her the best I could.  But it wasn’t enough.  I disappointed her many times.  She didn’t just need love.  She needed a pouring out of healing that only God could give.

And you know what? He did!!!!!  I have tears in my eyes as I write this.  Sarah became an amazing, beautiful, loving mother.  God gave her money to put a down payment on a condo.  He gave her a job at a private Christian school where her son could attend.  He gave her a church to call her family.  And the best part for me is that I get to still call her family.  I get to still love her.  God redeemed the pain.  If you met her today all you would see is beauty.  Beauty out of ashes.  Beauty despite what the enemy had planned.  Not just beautiful, but the deep kind of beauty that only comes from suffering and pain and wisdom and healing.  The kind of beauty that will never fade or disappear.

Today, Sarah is married to an amazing Christian man with two more kids.  Her son that lived with us is grown.  She is following the Lord wherever He leads.  She is compassionate, real and seeks God daily. She home schools and serves in her community.  She is the definition of beauty in every way. She is a gift.

So because of Elvis (and God), I got to witness a miracle.

I got to receive the gift. 

I got to be a gift.

I love you Sarah.